A thousand No’s

3 years sober and i am prevented from posting a pretty picture by the large dose of reality that this day brings. I am incredibly proud and ashamed in equal measure. It’s a bittersweet day of light and dark. What I expected to feel like my birthday feels more like a weight because I feel the pain of the journey.

Crave you

To celebrate this day also celebrates my failures and my limitations. 3 years is a hell of a lot of days and if I crave a drink several times a day then that is thousands of No’s wrapped up in a bow. I crave my best friend that lost me all my other friends.

Crave you

After the 12 steps, what is 13? On this day. I see thousands more steps stretched out in front of me. Its a triumph and I will celebrate this focused, caring, better smelling me. But its not a new me. She was always there. And i believe we still carry the addict inside us too. The struggle is real. Keep on marching. Keep on struggling x

Alice Smith 2020

361 recovery programme for women. More at http://www.goddesse.co.uk

#sober #soberlife #sobriety #sobergirl #mentalhealthrecovery #recovery #mentalheath #recoveryfromtrauma #ptsd #ptsdrecovery #addiction #aa #alcohol #beataddiction #12steps

Published by 361one

when I write I am a king. Listen to more at 361 live podcast

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