Marmalade sandwich

Alice Smith eats cold beans from the tin in Part 4 of her series from the hospital bed ‘Connecting to the mother keyboard.’

Have you ever eaten beans straight from the tin because you had no clean spoons? How about feeding the dog using a knitting needle to scoop out the meat? Rising from the throne on one leg? It’s surprising how enterprising you can be when you are forced to hop round on one leg and you are a single woman. Whilst recovering from a broken ankle (hello from week 10 living on one leg!) I’ve learnt many new ways to cope. But what has happened to the social support system we created back in the 1950’s to help us at times like this? It broke.

You broke it Maggie/Blair/ Boris (tick as appropriate)

The electric scooter company won’t deliver. The landlord isn’t prepared to fit ramps. The physio is backed up so you have to refer yourself online and pray to the bottle or your god of choice. The social worker looks at you like you are the last straw and suggests you order a daily take out sandwich (budget anyone?) She finally agrees to send in ‘reablement’ (sounds very Orwellian…..) to make a sandwich because ‘you are an alcoholic’ but only if ‘you lock away your puppy.‘ Red Cross workers will make you a sandwich but refuse to wipe the surfaces and it’s 9 weeks since your kitchen even smelt a squirt of bleach. In the meantime, it’s beans from the can and a marmalade sandwich because this is Wonderland after all….

Shit happened

What happened? If middle England really knew how flimsy state support has become they would not be sleeping so soundly under their Dunelm Mill duvets. I am only temporarily disabled – what about all the millions of people struggling whilst their out of touch social workers disappear on sick leave? It’s all breaking folks. This can only end one way unless the care sector gets mouth to mouth. Now.

Alice Smith is recovery from a serious injury and is writing a series of blogs from the hospital bed called ‘Connecting to the mother keyboard.’

Published by 361one

when I write I am a king. Listen to more at 361 live podcast

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